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Tuesday, February 27, 2007

What?! I'm a mom?


Today I went into the bathroom after changing the Schmoo's diaper and saw my reflection in the mirror: I was HOLDING A BABY. What the hell? I have a baby? I'm a mother? OK. I need more time to let this sink in.

Later on Seamus' social security card came in the mail. Even if there is no money left when he's 65, this does make it seem more real. Does it ever really sink in, parents?

Monday, February 26, 2007

Returning from hiatus

It's been a challenging ten days -- details later. Pictures first!

Auntie Leenie wants to tickle his little toes, so here they are -- you can tickle your screen, Lee.


He's fun to hold ...



Greta took some beautiful photos of him today while I was at work:



He just started smiling during the past few days!



Note: he doesn't have leprosy ... it's cradle cap. Calendula lotion is clearing it up. :-)

Saturday, February 17, 2007

The Surge and the Grandparents

I want Congress to pass a bill condemning Seamus' sleep habits of Wednesday and Thursday nights. For almost 48 hours, he slept only in less-than-two-hour segments -- sometime as little as ten minutes at at time for long stretches. In between these naps, he would loudly demand Greta's feeding services. By yesterday morning, she was running on fumes. Leaving her at home alone felt like condoning torture. "I'm trying to think of this in terms of his needs, rather than mine," she IM'ed me while I was at work, and I admired her ability to rise above her exhaustion.


Fortunately, a) even when we're exhausted, it's obvious to us that he is very cute and lovable, and b) on Thursday, Granny Frannie and Grand Poobah John broke up our routine by paying us a visit. We cleaned up by scraping a couple layers of cat hair off of the couch and shoveling all of the baby detritus to one side. Fran brought us a beautiful blanket that she had made for Seamus, and, as you can see, he curled up with it in her lap and slept while the adults socialized.

It was so good to see those two crazy kids, and on their thirty-second wedding anniversary, no less! My only complaint was that their visit was so short ... perhaps I could persuade them to move to Manhattan. No doubt the fact that they spent their first day of this visit sheltering from a stinging rain of freaking ice pellets has ruined any chance of that, though. Especially since they live in a place where they can grow avocados outside their door, and watch the sunset turn the Santa Ynez Mountains purple and blue every night.

After we packed Fran and John off to Lupa for their anniversary dinner, Greta went on the La Leche League site and discovered what's probably been happening with Seamie: a third-week growth spurt, right on schedule ... which meant that his sleeplessness was not going to last much longer. And indeed, last night he returned to (what we hope is) his regular habit of sleeping in about three-hour chunks. So this morning, the world looks brighter, birds are singing, and I've removed my "Free Baby" ad from Craigslist.

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Flying solo


Today was Greta's first full day at home alone with the Schmoo -- Sandy is back in CT again, and today was my first full day back at work.

Everyone says that taking care of a newborn is hard work, but I don't think we fully appreciated the kind of hard work that it would be: the exhaustion, the frustration, the worry, the self-doubt. While I've gotten a bit of this bitter cocktail of emotions, Greta is getting it full force: partly because of biology (Seamus spends about fifty percent of the day attached to her like a cute little leech), and partly because of economic necessity: Greta gets three months' worth of maternity leave (disability leave, actually), and I only got a week. Sadly, since we don't live in a yurt in the Catskills (the eminently practical Plan B for our lives that we've been keeping in reserve), we need to keep the money coming in, so I have to go to work. Add sleep deprivation and a post-partum hormone roller-coaster, and you've got one stressed mama.

Since we are dirty hippies at heart, I never thought we'd be doing this so traditionally: I kissed the wife and kid goodbye this morning, went off to work, and came home at the end of the day. As much as I enjoy fixing people's computers, I'd much rather be at home helping with Seamus. Ah, to live in a democratic-socialist state (ie, every other developed nation), where they provide humane maternity and paternity leave policies. (Take a good look at this chart -- it's shocking. We USAers are barbarians in this respect.)

However ... we just got a very nice call from Evelin, who gently advised us that, when things seem the toughest, we should remind ourselves how lucky we are. And it's true -- Seamus is beautiful and healthy ... and I remember for how long we tried to get pregnant. And while wind-driven ice pellets rain down outside, we are warm, dry, and incredibly spoiled, compared to 80% of the rest of the world. We just had spaghetti al vongole delivered to our door, for god's sake!

Also, we know this will get less stressful for Greta, as the hormones even out and we get to know Seamus better, and he (hopefully) develops more predictable sleeping habits. In the meantime, though, if you want to offer her some companionship and support while she's home alone these next few weeks, please email, IM, or call her during business hours ... I would be very grateful.

And a happy Valentine's Day to you all!

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Make Me Laugh!!

There's a pattern Jim, nanapow, and I started to notice in the past week where after the sun goes down, I start feeling very overwhelmed and scared about parenthood. I worry about how I'm going to screw up, not be good enough, fail, etc. I cry. Jim reassures me that it's hormonal and that soon I will be having all sorts of fun with our little boy---that it gets easier. I'm really okay most of the day, so please don't worry too much! I am taking good care of Seamus, feeding him and cuddling him and making sure he's comfie. Also, Jim and I discussed post partum depression before Seamus was born, and Jim promised to keep an eye on me for any troubling signs. So far, so good.

Last night, Jim called Midwife Karen, who assured me that I'm completely normal and that saying, "What the hell was I thinking when I decided to have a baby?" is also quite common (I've only actually said this once!). She suggested I get out of the apartment once a day without Seamus and just "go buy some socks or something." So today, I showered, fed Seamus, got him nice and sleepy, and handed him off to Daddy and then took a walk to CVS where I got some magazines and a mindless Sue Grafton novel (S is for Silence! EEK!) to keep me occupied today while Jim goes to work for a 1/2 day. It's my first time completely alone!

It would also help if you could make me laugh. Call, write, post --- do whatever you gotta do. Tell me something funny. I believe a good belly laugh goes a long way.

(Posted by Greta on Jim's account...can't figure out my login anymore!)

Monday, February 12, 2007

Mr. Science says ...


... did you know that baby orcas and dolphins don't sleep at all for their first month? So there's another reason to be grateful that we're primates ... let's see, our babies sleep a lot, we have language and the Rolling Stones, bagels and global warming ... so much to be proud of.

Ironically, "Shamu" is one of my nicknames for Seamus.

Yesterday afternoon and evening was another wakefulness marathon for our little orca ... it was only eight or nine hours though, not a month. And fortunately, the pattern is becoming clear: when he does that, he probably has a couple of longer sleep periods coming up ... just before we reach the end of our rope! The three of us got two good three-hour-plus sleep periods in overnight.

Jeez, I never thought I'd be so obsessed with sleep. I can calculate my sleep for any given twenty-four-hour period almost down to the minute.


In other news, Granny Frannie and Grand Poobah John will be taking advantage of their coveted grandparent visiting rights this week. Can't wait to introduce them to our little mammal!

Friday, February 09, 2007

Sleepy little piglet


I think that Seamus must have read my semi-desperate posts from a few days back, because ever since then, he has been the best little night sleeper we could ask for ... sleeping in four-hour chunks, only waking Greta up once or twice a night. Or perhaps, as Evelin suggested, Nanabanana's nurturing presence has calmed all three of us, allowing him to rest more easily. In any case, our mental health has improved approximately 750 percent. Furthermore, Dr. Chaudhary has certified that Greta's sinuses are all better, and that her mastitis is on the way out.

She also noted that Seamus gained nine ounces this past week -- smashing the standard "ounce a day" goal for newborns. That really doesn't surprise me, given the admirable, single-minded determination with which he sucks down breastmilk. (I told Jude that Seamus has inherited the Blau Appetite.) She also said that he's "very alert for a two-week old" -- no doubt this is an early sign of genius.

Tomorrow is my first full day back at work, which, as Bart Simpson would say, both sucks and blows. Given how well things have been going the past couple of days, though, I'm no longer worried about Greta coping without me -- and, of course, Sandy is here to ease the transition. She's leaving us again on Sunday (sniff), and I'm taking Monday off, so the first time that Greta will be flying solo will be when I work a half-day next Tuesday.

Thanks again to all of you for your advice, good wishes, and positive energy sent our way.

PS: Seamus is confirming that he is a piglet by making adorable snorching noises as he feeds in bed next to me as I write this ... wish you could hear it; it's hilarious.

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Seamus' First Real Bath!


Seamus has an almost-normal belly button now, so we gave him a real bath today. He loved it! We're off soon to his 2nd doctor's appt with Dr. Chaudhary, NYC's hottest family practitioner. I'll put an update up when we get back. Hopefully he has gained the weight he should and all will be well. We have a list a mile long of questions to ask the doctor and I have an appt after Seamus to talk about my mastitis and nasal/ear problems.

Sleep update: Jim got to sleep a whopping 9 hours last night, no interruptions and I got to sleep for about 7 of about 9.5 hours. It was a good night. Seamus is cuter than ever today.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Seamus in 2023


Many thanks to everyone who chimed in with suggestions on the previous post ... I think Seamus is secretly reading this blog, because he's decided to make me a liar today. He's followed up his five-hour overnight sleep with two more 2-hour-plus naps, and has fallen into them after nursing with blissful ease. Perhaps it has something to do with Nanabanana's calming presence -- she returned to us in the wee small hours this morning to stay with us again for a few days ... it's so good to have her here. Or maybe they're just very mercurial at this age. It's like getting a brand-new baby every day!

Seamus actually fell into his first nap without even nursing first. He's been transitioning from the newborn "nothing but eating and sleeping" behavior into spending more time just hanging out and staring at things (which, coincidentally, is how our cats spend their free time as well). He loves his changing table (many thanks to Teri's friend Mary-Margaret), and was enjoying lying there for a while this morning, staring at the bright (though bitterly cold) day outside while I talked to him, moved his legs to make him "dance", etc. Eventually he got tired of that, so I cuddled him on my lap on the couch. Soon, his eyes got droopy and he fell asleep. Sooo frickin' sweet, to have my son falling asleep in my lap, while stroking his silky little head ... I said to him (quietly), "Seamus, I'm going to try to remember this moment when you're sixteen and you want to get something pierced."

Of course, Uncle Frank will probably just take him out to the piercing place upon request ... :-)

Child Sleep Consultant


... that's my latest idea for how to get rich: I'll become a Child Sleep Consultant. Kind of like Nanny 911 or Supernanny, except without all the psychotherapeutic stuff. I'd just go into a home and figure out how to get the kids to sleep in a reasonable manner, thereby saving their parents' sanity. I figure that many parents would be willing to empty out their bank accounts for this sort of service.

But first of all, I refuse to wear the stupid cape. What do capes have to do with child care, anyway? I don't get that at all.

Secondly, I first need to figure out Greta and Seamus' sleep issues. Right now, he's like a !Kung baby, who wants to be on the breast every fifteen minutes all day long (see the post by "Mikani" here). Here's a brief summary of last night's follies:

- 9am Tuesday: on the Monday-to-Tuesday overnight, Seamus has slept about six hours in two or three long chunks. Greta and I feel that we're getting the sleep thing under control.
- 2:30pm: The three of us wake, happy, from a two-hour nap. We try out Seamus' playpad thingie (see previous post) and have some tea (see other previous post).
- 7:00pm: We begin to wonder when he's going to sleep again. He nurses, he starts to doze, he wakes up, he nurses again.
- 9:30pm: finally asleep!
- 10:00pm: Greta makes a minute adjustment to his blanket; he wakes up and wants to be fed. After a decent amount of feeding, I try soothing him, Bonu-style.
- 10:45pm: Fussy boy is back on the breast. Greta: "Why did we do this??" He's been up for eight and a half hours now.
- 10:50pm - 11:25pm: Suck, doze, root, suck, doze, squirm, root, suck.
- 11:25pm: Greta yanks out the Sound Sleeper's power cord and tosses it onto the couch. "Well, this thing obviously isn't working," she mutters.
- 11:30pm: I take off my shirt and Seamus', and try some skin-to-skin soothing and rocking. I let him suck on my pinkie for a while. This is a sweet interlude for the two of us, but when he begins to squirm vigorously and threatens to latch on to my nipple, I give him back to Greta.
- 12:15am: Finally asleep for real! ... and he doesn't wake up again until 5am. Theoretically, you're not supposed to let newborns sleep that long for fear that they won't be eating enough, but we seriously doubt that Seamus is underfed at this point.
All in all, Seamus slept only eleven hours yesterday, in shameless (shameless Seamus?) defiance of the charts that say he should be sleeping about sixteen hours. Well, I guess someone has to be at one end of the bell curve ...

So before I can embark on my new career, we need to crack the Seamus Code. Actually, I guess I need all of you to be Child Sleep Consultants and give us some suggestions. Souffle wrote us an email last night, extolling the virtues of a vibrating seat that she's going to give to us, but I'm sure that many of you out there in parent-land have other suggestions.

Actually, I suspect that all of you read the timeline above while shaking your heads and saying, "It's obvious what they're doing wrong! They just need to [blank]" ... so feel free to use the comments to fill in the blank. :-)

I suspect that the blank needs to be filled in with "... wait; it'll gradually get easier and he'll sleep longer and more easily."

Also, we are keeping in mind what Souffle said at the end of her email:

"Seamus will learn to eat, and sleep, and crawl, and laugh, and try to
make you laugh, and give you kisses and hugs and raspberries, and
learn to say "uh-oh" and "ai-uv-ooo" and sing "eee-aii-yai-oh", and
be in awe the first time you blow bubbles for him, and your head will
keep bursting at all the universe you never saw before, and it's
worth every minute of lost sleep and pain."

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Teatime


Rooting through our cabinet, I was delighted to find some biscotti that Eileen had sent me from Italy for Christmas. Noticing that it was five o'clock, I decided it was teatime. I put together a plate with the biscotti and some crustless cucumber-and-cream-cheese sandwiches, and made some decaf tea for Greta, and some chai for me. For a moment, I felt very calm and civilized.

You can see the sandwiches in the background above. They really should be on white bread, but they were pretty good on the brown bread that we had.

Too bad we didn't have any "staff" to prepare all of this for us. I think that's why I love BBC period dramas: for the inevitable moment when tea is served.

Seamus Sees A Seamus


... thanks to his very first toy, a neato play-yard given to him by Rob and Kim. Thanks guys!

Seamus has been doing more "hanging out" the past days -- he's not just sleeping or eating 100% of the time. It's fun to be able to just interact with him ... wiggle his toes, stroke his head ...

Last night started out challenging, with a bunch of back-to-back feedings, but eventually he slept for longer periods. It's amazing how one can get used to getting five or six non-consecutive hours of sleep a night.

For everyone who has expressed concern about Greta, many thanks ... she's feeling better.

Monday, February 05, 2007

Quick Post


The past few days have been challenging --- first day, Seamus had a marathon, never-ending nursing sesh; second day, he wanted to eat every hour forever; and the third day, I woke up at 3 am with a 102.9 fever and a bad case of mastitis (blockage of the milk ducts) and what we think is a sinus infection. Overwhelming is an understatement.

All I could think is "I WANT MY MOMMY!" And so she will be making another appearance on Wednesday to help us out again for another few days. Phew.

I realized this morning that even though it has really been difficult the past few days, Seamus is really an easy baby. He doesn't cry all night for no reason, he's not sickly, he's cute as hell, he's a good eater, he let us sleep last night a lot, etc. All in all, we're very lucky that we got this particular little bundle of joy. The doula said that some baby's personalities change around two weeks, but I'm ignoring that! NO!!!!

Here's a picture of Seamus getting his first bath.

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Rough evening

Greta's massage was great ... but since then, Seamus has pretty much been feeding constantly again. I sent Greta to bed for an hour, and was able to keep him asleep by strategic rocking ... but only for an hour. Then he got another hour's worth of feeding -- after which I sent Greta to bed again, and tried to soothe him to sleep once more (trying to channel Bonu's smooth baby-rocking moves) ... but this time, he never dropped off, and after a half an hour, he started rooting around and crying for food again. Ay caramba!

Greta's not at the end of her rope, but she can see it from here ... she's feeling a bit desperate ... please send some telepathic signals to this voracious little boy: you are getting sleeeeepyyy ... verrrry sleeepppyyyy ...

Thanks to Teri, Sandy ("the other Sandy"), and Mimi for their words of advice and encouragement!


5am update: the little snorcher finally let us sleep for three hours ... that may seem like a very short time, but it was pure bliss for us. I credit the mass telepathy for this. Keep it coming!

Marathon Man

As of this moment, Seamus has now been feeding, pretty much nonstop, for two and half hours. I suspect this may be some kind of record, but Greta is not celebrating.

This comes directly on the heels of another one-feeding-an-hour marathon, from 3am to 10am this morning. Fortunately, he went very easy on us yesterday, and we felt almost caught up on our sleep before he started his marathon -- so Greta's not as desperately tired as she would be otherwise. Still, it's not pleasant. "Seamus," she says, "it's a good thing you're so damn cute. I wouldn't do this for anyone else."

The good news is that, in about an hour, a friend of Bonu's is coming over: she's a massage therapist (and a doula herself) who specializes in postpartum massage. Greta really really needs this right now -- the timing is perfect.

We're hoping that Seamus is about to head into another cycle of 3-hour sleeps. I mean, he has to sleep sometime, right? Right??

Update: it's 3pm EST ... Greta is being massaged ... adorable baby is asleep on my chest ... kitty is sitting next to me on the couch ... life is good.

Greta still needs to get some sleep, though. I'm hoping that Seamus will now sleep for, say, 14 hours or so.

Friday, February 02, 2007

Farewell (for now), Nanabanana!


Sandy's been gone about 24 hours now, and boy, do we miss her. The dishes are piling up in the sink, the garbage is overflowing, and it would have been great to have her moral support and comfort during Seamus' overnight feeding marathon last night.

On the other hand, it was very sweet to see how happy she and Grampy Cliff were to be reunited ... as much as Greta & I love her, we don't want to hog her to ourselves.

Also, there is something nice about having just our little family here for now. I feel closer than ever to Greta and Seamus today.

I'm looking forward to when we can take Seamus up to visit Cliff and Sandy in Milford -- especially because we'll be able to introduce him to his great-grandmother, who I believe has been saving up a lot of love to lavish upon him.



Update: I'm coming back to this post after a few hours ... Seamus was very good to us today; he has consistently slept in over-two-hour stretches, including one blissful four-hour stretch. Greta and I were able to recharge our batteries, and we feel a thousand percent better. I was able to make us some dinner, take out the trash, check the mail, and do some of the dishes.

We talked to midwife Karen again this evening, and she reassured us once more that Greta's low fever is "nothing tragic" -- she probably has a virus, but overall she feels pretty good, so her body seems to be fighting it off. If it gets worse, I'll take her to see Seamus' doctor -- who, as a family practitioner, can take care of her as well as our baby.

Greta's napping with Seamus right now, but I think we'll be okay overnight tonight, even if Seamus decides to upload several gallons of milk to an alternate dimension again tonight. Thanks to all of you who offered your sympathy and support.

Hi Granny Franny


Behold Seamus, trying out the hat that his dad's mom made for him. Very stylish!

He's making his "What the hell is going on here?!" face. He has a couple of other cute expressions, such as the "Who are you?" face, and the "Now I am very upset." face ... many more to come, I'm sure.

Baby Mama Drama


Greta has been plagued by sinus headaches since Seamus' birth. She has a long history of sinus problems, so it's not that surprising: for the last week, she's been staying in an overheated (or perfectly-heated, from Seamus' perspective) apartment, during a cold spell here in NYC -- the perfect recipe for bone-dry air.

I had set up a humidifier before the birth, so I couldn't understand why it was so dry in here, until I took a look at the humidifier's "wick" thing yesterday. Disgustingly, it was more cat hair than wick -- I hadn't changed it for a few months. Even worse, because it's a wick, the cat hair was all wet ... eww eww eww! So basically, we've been breathing in damp hairballs and dry air for the past week.

I replaced the wick yesterday, and the apartment's air is much better now, and Greta's sinuses are getting better, too, I think. But in the meantime, I had called midwife Karen to ask if she had any advice about Greta's headaches. Karen called us back immediately, alarmed that Greta might have preeclampsia, a dangerous, high-blood-pressure-related condition that occurs sometimes in late pregnancy. You may recall the 24-hour pee test that the midwives had her take just before labor started ... well, the result of that test came back positive a couple of days after the birth; Greta had had a slight case of preeclampsia. This makes me even more glad that we did the castor oil induction, as awful as it was. Greta's condition could have become serious enough to make homebirth impossible, and it would have been a shame to have to deliver in a hospital after all of our preparation.

Preeclampsia, almost by definition, is cured by delivering the baby, but in some rare cases, it lingers after birth -- hence Karen's concern. And once Karen voiced her concern, suddenly we were all concerned. Karen told Greta to take two Advil and call her back in in hour; if the headache went away, it was probably a sinus headache; if it didn't, Karen wanted us to take Greta to the emergency room to get her checked again for preeclampsia.

"I am not going to the ****ing emergency room," growled Greta, but Sandy and I sternly admonished her that we would drag her there if need be, if that's what Karen recommended.

Fortunately, the headache responded to the Advil, so the crisis was defused. This was a couple of days ago (sorry that I can't be more specific; time has an elastic quality for me this week); last night, Greta was feeling headachy and overall poorly again. Grampy Cliff had arrived to take Sandy home (sniff), but delayed his departure to run over to the drug store and get an oral thermometer. (We do have the other kind of thermometer on hand for Seamus should he need it, but I didn't want to subject Greta to that.)

It turned out that Greta was running a slight temperature (100.6), so the crisis atmosphere ramped up again. Did she have preeclampsia after all? Or a sinus infection? Or some other kind of childbirth-related infection?

Fortunately, this time, Karen calmed us. She said that Greta's temperature was not high enough to be of great concern. She suggested that Greta was slightly dehydrated, and Sandy and I had to admit that we had not quite lived up to our responsibility to push fluids into her over the past half-day or so.

So we rehydrated my poor wifie, gave her Advil and Tylenol, and helped soothe Seamus so she could nap. Within an hour, her temperature came down and she felt better. Crisis averted again ... but I will be making sure that she drinks enough (breastfeeding women need to drink a large amount of fluids) and gets enough rest.

We need Seamus' help with the last part, though. Last night, after the Powells left, he put us (Greta, mostly) through a marathon of half-hour-plus feedings every hour for six hours in a row. This might have been bearable if Greta hadn't already been exhausted, but it was very challenging and frustrating under the circumstances.

Fortunately, Seamus has rewarded us with several two-hour plus sleeping periods since that time, so we feel almost human again. But while standing at the kitchen counter at 3am while Greta nursed our insatiable little boy yet again, I desperately searched the Internets for help in dealing with the ordeal. And on the discussion boards of the outstanding hippy-dippy-crunchy-dolphin-safe (and I mean that in a good way ...) website Mothering.com, I found a couple of useful suggestions that we will be adopting:

- Learn to breastfeed with you and your baby lying on your sides in bed, facing one another. That way you don't have to fully wake up in order to breastfeed, and the baby doesn't have to be moved when he's done eating, and will therefore be more likely to stay asleep.
- With a newborn, be strict about sleeping when he sleeps. The temptation to do other things (such as blog posts) while he sleeps is strong, but if you give in, you will pay for it with exhaustion later.

Several people on the boards also mentioned that you should not panic and assume that what a newborn is doing during a given time period is a pattern that he will continue to follow. They change a lot.


One other person had a scary post about how her child had breastfed every half-hour for the first year. But even that mother, and others with similar experiences, did not sound bitter about it. The overriding attitude of all of these posts was, It's extremely challenging for everyone -- take care of yourself, adopt whatever strategy works for you, and remember that this madness won't last forever. And that it's totally worth it.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Hey, jimma, that's my baby / No, jimma, I don't mean maybe


I've noticed that Greta is a bit proprietary about our little guy. Several times, when I've offered to hold him so that she can lie down, she's said, "No, that's okay," while staring down at him and gently stroking him. Clearly, she is in love ... but so am I! I got my chance early this morning, when Greta, exhausted from a three-hour string of back-to-back feedings and diaper changes, woke me up and whimpered, "I have got to get some sleep," and collapsed next to me.

I gently picked Seamus up and put him on my chest -- several people have told us that letting him sleep that way will encourage him to sleep longer. So I held him and patted him, rocked him whenever he half-woke, and marveled at his unlikely existence: this tiny little human, totally dependent on us, whom we had conjured out of nothing. Greta woke around three hours later, feeling much refreshed (it's surprising how much such a short sleep can help).

She also is very mama-bear protective. Not only did she show her claws to that infamous metermaid, she even bear-growled at me one time. On Seamus' second or third day (it all blurs together), the sleep deprivation caused me to have very vivid and unsettling dreams during one of our one-hour sleep periods. When Greta tried to wake me to help her with a feeding, I flailed my arms spasmodically, warding off some dream-threat: I even grabbed Greta's wrist. Fearing that I might accidentally hit Seamus (lying between us) if that happened again, Greta immediately exiled me to the couch until I could get caught up on my sleep. I guiltily scrunched up on the small couch, and immediately fell into another nightmare: there were mushroom clouds on the horizon, and Greta and I were frantically trying to escape somewhere. No more 24 for me -- or, more practically, no more letting myself reach that level of exhaustion.

I have no hard feelings, though. I could have accidentally hit Shamu, and now I have a built-in excuse for sneaking in some extra sleep: "Can you do this diaper change, honey? -- You don't want me to lose it again, do you?"